Baytree Garden Center’s top tips for mess-free bird feeding
I’ve seen a real difference in my wife this week since she joined a new Latin dance class. According to Antonio – my wife’s coach is tall, dark, handsome, young and manly – she has a real talent for dancing.
Since returning from a local home for elderly people, she has not been able to do enough for me. Just last night after she found my life insurance policies and gave me a nice warm bath. To make sure I wouldn’t miss my favorite TV show, she thoughtfully balanced the TV on a rickety old chair next to my bathtub.
I imagine that because I sprayed bath salts and essential oils in large quantities, I fell asleep in the bathroom which is very dangerous. However, I had the most realistic dreams ever. Maybe it was because I was watching Saving Private Ryan earlier, but I dreamed I was on the beaches of Normandy with loud explosions all around. I swear I felt water spray on my face.
Imagine my surprise then when a fully equipped ambulance crew stormed into the bathroom followed by my loving, sobbing wife. I can only assume that while sleeping, the TV fell out of the rickety old chair before it got into the bathwater. Fortunately for me, the plug was pulled out of the wall as it fell. My wife explained to the crew that she saw my lifeless body in the bathroom along with the 65-inch (and very heavy) plasma screen that she carefully balanced on the rickety old chair and ended up thinking the worst.
After surviving the indignity of an ambulance crew who stormed into the bathroom carrying nothing but a pink shower puff to protect my modesty, I felt it best to lie down in a dark room to recover. Later that evening my dear wife asked me if I could fill and clean the bird table in the morning. For my efforts she would make me a drink to die for.
As agreed, I headed out to the garden to check the feed levels on our bird tables. At this time of year it’s really important to start looking for our little feathered friends, they do so much to help protect my garden plants from being eaten by pests. However, to survive the winter, a little help from ourselves is greatly appreciated.
When it comes to feeding birds, I choose fat balls. These, as the name suggests, are basically balls of fat with all kinds of delicious crumbs that birds love. If you’ve ever watched birds eat, you’ll know that it can be quite messy. The great thing about no mess birdseed is that should any seed fall onto the soil or be carried around your garden and deposited later, it will not germinate. You won’t end up with unexpected plants.
You’d be really surprised how quickly word can spread among the wild bird population that there’s food in your garden. It will be like the McDonald’s of the wild bird world (there are other fast food restaurants available). Just make sure you have a saucer or bowl of water for the birds to drink and perhaps bathe in, although I would hold off on providing towels for them as they won’t appreciate your extra effort.
That’s what I did now as the present Mrs. Cox promised me a nice warm drink made from berries harvested from her own plants in the secret part of her garden. I am very lucky.
(Tags for translation)Animals